JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #700.424.25!

Sparks – Kimono My House (Island) :: Geddit?

SIZZLING PARTY PLATTER OF THE WEEK: Rosemary Clooney – “Come On-A My House” (Columbia) :: Who invited all these people?

KISS – “Rock And Roll All Nite” (Casablanca) :: Oh, man, that’ll never wash out!

Quiet Riot – “Cum On Feel The Noize” (Pasha) :: Keep it down before the neighbors complain!

Andrew WK – “Party Hard” (Mercury) :: C’mon, let’s use this empty bedroom!

Slade – “How D’You Ride?” (Polydor) :: Who parked on the lawn?

Elton John – “Saturday Night’s All Right For Fighting” (MCA) :: Guys, guys, take it outside!

Elvis Costello – The Delivery Man (Lost Highway) :: Pizza’s here! Who’s got the money?

Lou Reed – “The Power Of Positive Drinking” (Arista) :: I think I can jimmy the lock on this liquor cabinet!

John Entwistle – “Whiskey Man” (Decca) :: Got it!

Faces – Five Guys Walk Into A Bar… (Warner Bros.) :: Hey, while you’re up!

The B-52’s – “Party Out Of Bounds” (Reprise) :: The beer bottles in the freezer exploded!

The Who – “However Much I Booze” (MCA) :: Where’s the keg?

Kim Mitchell – “I Am A Wild Party” (Anthem) :: Where’s the can, I gotta go water my horse!

Johnny Winter – “Too Much Seconal” (Columbia) :: Dude, you look peaked!

Blood, Sweat & Tears – “And When I Die” (Columbia) :: Dude?

Rick Derringer – “Still Alive And Well” (Epic) :: Dude, that was close!

The Irish Rovers – “Wasn’t That A Party?” (Epic) :: Cold pizza and beer, breakfast of champions!

Johnny Cash – “Sunday Morning Coming Down” (Columbia) :: Keep those drapes closed! And don’t slam the door when you leave!

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #699.423.24!

John Cale & Lou Reed – Songs For Drella (Sire) :: Everything they’ve done separately, no matter how good, is mere artifice compared to this sincere, monumental work of art. When’s the last time you listened to it?

The Sharp Ease – Going Modern (olFactory) :: Meanwhile, if Cale and Lene Lovich had sired quadruplet daughters 25 years ago, those four femmes would’ve grown up to record this smart ’n’ sassy pop album.

Tara Angell – Down And Out: The Come Down EP (Rykodisc) :: Hide the razorblades because if ever a record lived up to its title, it’s this one. This dour dish makes Marianne Faithfull sound like Toni Basil cranked to the gills on a helium speedball.

Josh Rouse – Nashville (Rykodisc) :: Maybe the Ryman Auditorium isn’t ready for a guy who sings lyrics like: “Later on, after the show, we can go to your room, I can try on your clothes.”

Johnny Cash – “A Boy Named Sue” (Columbia) :: Then again, maybe it is.

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: The Devlins – Waves (Nettwerk) :: Having survived the trauma of Chas being killed by Harry Flowers, the two remaining brothers buck up and record this fine album. I like that, turn it up.

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #698.422.23!

Dave Cooper – Underbelly: Additional Observations On The Beauty / Ugliness Of Mostly Pillowy Girls (Fantagraphics Books) :: This coffee table art book contains erotically singed paintings of large ravenously mandibled women who have the bug-eyed visages of Sandy Dennis in leering lolling heat. Roll over Bill Ward, and tell Robert Crumb the news.

Dandi Wind – Bait The Traps (Bongo Beat) :: Lene Lovich + Iggy Stooge + Nina Hagen + Eno + Diamanda Galás + Kraftwerk = Crazy, man, crazy!

Aselin Debison – Bigger Than Me (Epic) :: Bland on bland.

Audra Kubat – Since I Fell In Love With The Music (Times Beach) :: Audra has the delicate demeanor of a sparrow, coupled with a heartfelt emotive voice and superior songwriting skills. She’s the new Joni Mitchell, only a whole lot better.

The Static Age – Neon Nights Electric Lives (Tarantulas) :: “Ghosts” has a propulsive jangling that’s somewhat reminiscent of the Banshees but, more often than not, this intelligent quartet has a suave sound that’s nothing less than the debonair second coming of Ultravoxy Music.

Femme Fatale – From The Abundance Of The Heart, The Mouth Speaks (Last Gang) :: King, it’s Shellac vs. the Beastie Boys in a last-band-standing, elimination chamber, hell-in-a-cell, grudge match.

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE MONTH: Mommy And Daddy – Fighting Style Killer Panda (Kanine) :: Here’s a delightfully kooky EP that features a nutty sonic mélange of blipping Casio keys, pounding Roland drum machines, heavy metal guitars and snatch-snarling female vocals. This New York duo is being portrayed as “a married couple who play stripped-down, avant garde, primitive, post-punk, lo-fi, electropop retro rock.” Which is one way of describing them, I suppose. Here’s another: They’re outta their heads.

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #697.420.21!

Ray Wylie Hubbard – Delirium Tremolos (Philo/Rounder) :: If you’re in the market for a new country blues album, give this instant classic by old mutha Hubbard a shot. Another reason to believe: Faces stalwart Ian “Mac” McLagan works the Hammond B-3 on several tracks.

Neal Schon – i On U (Favored Nations) :: Journey-man Schon rises above the synth backing tracks to craft an instrumental guitar album that’s part silky David Gilmour and part psycho Jeff Beck. Too bad he’d rather play with himself than be in a real band, though.

Soul Sirkus – World Play (Soul Sirkus) :: Well whaddya know? Schon upgrades to actual human beings! If you still proudly listen to old Sammy Hagar albums, then this thud’s for you.

Burn The 8-Track – The Ocean (Abacus) :: These four guys aren’t old enough to remember vinyl, let alone an 8-track. But they are mature enough to make an album that’s powerful and passionate.

Liam Titcomb – Liam Titcomb (Columbia) :: Canada’s answer to John Mellencamp is a long-haired pretty boy who writes hand-clappin’ good-time music including a little ditty called “Get Down” that actually does.

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: Vanessa Williams – Everlasting Love (Lava) :: Need some ’70s make-out music? Then slide in and take this VW for a ride that’s so smooth you could cut a diamond in the back seat. My favorite track is the Kraftwerkian “Tuning,” which consists of nothing but Vanessa tuning in different radio stations. Really.

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #696.419.20!

Coralie Clement – Bye Bye Beauté (Nettwerk) :: Look, if I want to hear a breathy babe cooing sweet nothings to me in a foreign language, I’ll listen to Lola Dutronic instead, all right?

Lola Dutronic – The World Of Lola Dutronic (Bongo Beat) :: Whatever Lola wants, Lola gets. So go out and get these luscious covers of “Walking On Sunshine,” “To Sir With Love,” and “Porpoise Song.”

Loopy – Smile Back Home (Zip) :: This must-have merges all the power of a classic three-chord rock band with the heavenly heartfelt harmonies of Brian Wilson.

Razor Crusade – Infinite Water (Deathwish) :: Hey, sailor, looking for a hot screw of screamotronic vocals and a heavy spew of garage guitars?

Theory Of A Deadman – Gasoline (Roadrunner) :: The singer apes Chris Cornell, but this rent-a-drummer trio does heavy blustery rage that’s right up there with the best of them.

The Living End – Modern ARTillery (Reprise) :: I don’t know much about art, but I know what I don’t like.

Various Artists – Mary Had A Little Amp (Epic) :: It wasn’t just for show. And when she played this disc through it, she said: “This record blows!”

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: DMBQ – The Essential Sounds From The Far East (Estrus!) :: Are you ready for the absolute heaviest rock ’n’ roll album of the week? Hendrix in the East. Reincarnated in Japan. As Godzilla. With a guitar. And a wall of over-cranked amps. Run for your lives!

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #695.416.17!

Raphael Saadiq – As Ray Ray (Pookie) :: Blaxploitation movie parody gets bogged down in an overlong barrage of falsetto ballad clichés.

Sum 41 – Chuck (Island) :: If you kids want me to take your anti-war songs seriously, then don’t destroy your credibility by calling your publishing company Rectum Renovator Music. Yeah, that’s the sign of a mature, informed adult.

K-OS – Joyful Rebellion (Astralwerks) :: Phinally, a rapper who can actually sing hip-pop and isn’t aphraid to mix saxofones and ambient symfonic music with his phat beats.

Roxy Music – Viennalle (Mainstream) :: Recorded in December 1973 during the Stranded tour of Austria, this listenable audience recording contains rare live versions of “Street Life,” “Amazona” and “Psalm.”

Mobb Deep – Amerikaz Nightmare (Jive) :: If these Cube wannabes were half as rich as they pretend to be, they wouldn’t have to pimp lame copycat records like this to make a buck.

Various Artists – Take Action! (Sub City) :: Putting a free copy of a suicide prevention book on this double compilation is an admirable notion, but doesn’t the inclusion of a band called ‘Murder By Death’ send a mixed message?

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: Quintron – The Frog Tape (Skin Graft) :: I dunno what’s scarier: a guy in Louisiana spending half an hour recording frog sounds on a cassette while playing a Wurlitzer and laughing into the mic; a record company actually releasing it; or me giving it a Sizzling Platter Of The Week.

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #694.415.16!

The Slackers – Close My Eyes (Hellcat) :: Closed my ears instead.

Loque – So Long (Lava) :: Low key, see ya.

Stroke 9 – All In (Records, Man!) :: Stupid band name. Smart rock album.

No Warning – Suffer, Survive (Machine Shop) :: Fair warning: delete, delight.

The Aeffect – Secrets and Lies (Hitchhiker) :: Gosh, I miss the Human League.

7 Seconds – Take It Back, Take It On, Take It Over! (Side One Dummy) :: Ramones meet Badfinger and carry on bopping till tomorrow.

Court And Spark – Witch Season (Absolutely Kosher) :: The credits list 25 musicians who crafted this smart set of acoustic-based harmonious pop music, including the name of the guy who did the hand claps. Too bad they forgot to name any of the singers.

Kelly Clarkson – Breakaway (RCA) :: If legendary record producer Clive Davis honestly thinks that this puerile pap is what passes for a good female vocalist these days, then he oughtta have his head read.

Janis Joplin – Pearl (Columbia) :: With her dowdy looks and coarse voice, you just know she’d never get signed by fuddy-duddy Davis today.

Moody Bluegrass – A Nashville Tribute To The Moody Blues (Rounder) :: Finally, a banjo and fiddle version of “Nights In White Satin.”

The Trews – House Of Ill Fame (Epic) :: One of 2003’s unmitigated pop masterpieces is back on the racks with a bonus disc of new live tracks including their seismic extrapolation of “Hey Jude.”

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: Mark Dignam – Box Heart Man (Times Beach) :: Irish folk singer Dignam starts off his record with a classic George Harrison “Blue Jay Way” drone before abruptly shifting gears down into some of the strongest and most heartfelt pickin’ and singin’ I’ve heard in quite a while.

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #693.414.15!

Valdy – Viva Valdy: Live At Last (Rack-On-Tour) :: The troubadour you can trust who gave us the enduring “Rock ’n’ Roll Song” is back with a double album that’s one side live, one side studio, and both sides wow.

Day Of Infamy – Red Autumn (DOI) :: The Everly Brothers meet Audioslave. Wake up, little snoozie.

Kasabian – Kasabian (RCA) :: Dylan joins the Strawberry Alarm Clock and records a trippy stoner album.

Skindred – Babylon (Lava) :: I’d rather hear Jar Jar Binks babble on than listen to this snore-bore in a grotty dread.

UPO – The Heavy (DRT) :: If the Home Shopping Channel ran a music network for zirconium metal bands, these guys would be No. 1 with a mullet.

Blue Öyster Cult – We’re Cooking For You (MEnu262) :: The Cult contributes recipes to a fan cookbook. I remember when they used to cook in the studio instead.

Dennis DeYoung – The Music of Styx Live With Symphony Orchestra (Grand Illusion) :: And with a donation to PBS of only $150, you’ll get a copy of the new double CD plus the DVD!

Eddie From Ohio – This Is Me (Virginia Soul) :: Literate lyrics, earnest songwriting, honey-flavored female vocals.

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: The Beatnuts – Milk Me (Penalty Recordings) :: I was gonna end by warning ya about this sexist cover photo which shows a lissome Nubian goddess reclining in a skimpy lime green bikini while thick creamy white liquid is poured all over her glistening ebony endowments but, wouldn’t ya know it, I’m plumb out of room.

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #692.413.14!

Diana Degarmo – Blue Skies (RCA) :: And you thought Jewel was stacked.

Mix Master Mike – Bangzilla (Scratch) :: I knew Steinski. Steinski was a friend of mine. Beastie Boy, you’re no Steinski.

Gym Class Heroes – The Papercut EP (Fueled By Ramen) :: I bet Dylan wishes he could write a line like: “She’s the reason for the lesions.”

Matt Sharp – Matt Sharp (Boompa) :: Plaintive music so utterly anguished yet hauntingly beautiful it’s almost too painful to listen to.

Strung Out – Exile In Oblivion (Fat Wreck Chords) :: Lame grunge band called Strung Out begins its record by stealing 20 seconds of Billie Holiday, geddit? Well, don’t get it.

Jakalope – It Dreams (Orange) :: Proof positive that anyone with a Mac can ape NIN and record Jamming With Reznor.

Simple Plan – Not Getting Any (Lava) :: Sure they’re not. That’s why there’s a flier stuck inside that shills the songs on their new album as ring tones at $2.50 a pop.

Jem – Finally Woken (ATO) :: Narcotic and erotic music to read Edward Gorey by.

Lesbians On Ecstasy – Lesbians On Ecstasy (Alien8) :: Today on Maury: Women who love women and the fishy records they make.

Westlife – Allow Us To Be Frank (RCA) :: A pack of real rats could sing better than these four fops.

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: Vampire Beach Babes – Beach Blanket Bedlam! (Divine Idustries Inc.) :: By combining the feisty fiesta vocals of the B-52s with the seamy archirony of the Cramps, these fun-loving culture vultures are the kitschiest thing to hit the surf since Eric Von Zipper hung 10.

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #691.411.12!

Pink Floyd – The Wall (Columbia) :: Producer Bob Ezrin records school kids on 1979 album, school kids now sue for royalties.

John Wayne – America, Why I Love Her (MPI) :: Now, more than ever.

The Dears – No Cities Left (SpinART) :: Just when you think that theatrical rock is dead, somebody comes along to prove you right.

KISS – Destroyer (Casablanca) :: Bob Ezrin records school kids on 1976 album, school kids now sue for royalties.

The Music – Welcome To The North (Capitol) :: Jon Anderson on heavy-metal steroids? Yes!

Blanche – If We Can’t Trust The Doctors (V2) :: Fans of Angelo Badalamenti and Julie Cruise might like the tremulous tremolo tunes that these local yokels are a-pickin’.

Dead Celebrity Status – Blood Music (HRM) :: Medic! Transfusion! Too late, somebody call the coroner.

Alice Cooper – School’s Out (Warner Bros.) :: Ezrin records school kids on 1972... Oops, ran out of space!

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: Kaada Patton – Romances (Ipecac) :: Just when you think that you’ve heard it all, along comes the absolute weirdest album of the year. If Leonard Cohen had been a black falsetto horror movie TV host back in the ’50s who dug Stockhausen, he couldn’t have come up with a more deliriously psychotronic album than this.

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #690.410.11!

B.I.G. – Reloaded (Slaystation) :: Play online as either Biggie or 2Pac and solve the conspiracy! Assault and battery not included.

Ali Shaheed Muhammad – Shaheedullah And Stereotypes (Penalty) :: Shaheed my words because this stereo tripe isn’t dullah, it’s duller.

The Bones – Straight Flush Ghetto (Liquor and Poker) :: Some people think the world has had enough of noisy rock songs. But I listen to these funky punkabillys and I see it isn’t so.

Sarah Fimm – Nexus (self-released) :: Earnest and plaintive, this sultry synthesiren is the new and improved Peter Gabriel. Which makes her a whole lot easier on the ears and, especially, the eyes.

Million Dollar Marxists – Give It A Name (Gearhead) :: Frothing like a dog that’s been infected by the rabies, this hard-rocking quintet ain’t no million-dollar maybe.

Morris Tepper – Head Off (Candlebone) :: Remember how Dylan was rumored to have secretly recorded an album while he was in seclusion after his motorcycle accident left him temporarily brain damaged? Well, here it is.

Nitromusk – Things I’ve Done (Stratospheric) :: The Rutles meet Cheap Trick. Surrender, but don’t give your day job away because the Delete Police are calling your name.

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: Dry Kill Logic – The Dead And Dreaming (Repossession) :: Lead screamer Cliff Rigano is smart enough to know that variety is the spice of life and man enough to show the world that he can also actually sing. Factor in stellar musicianship and shrewd arrangements and you have the reason why DKL is one small step away from rightfully claiming the heavy metal throne.

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #689.409.10!

The Who – The Who Sell Out (Decca) :: Automobile commercials. Hewlett-Packard commercials. The CSI franchise. And you thought they were just being ironic.

Wu-Tang Clan – Greatest Hits (BMG) :: Bill Cosby is right.

O.D.B. – O.D.B. (Roc-A-Fella) :: D.O.A.

Wolf Eyes – Burned Mind (Sub Pop) :: Vicious, you hit me with this neural nullifying slice of neurotic electronica from Ann Arbor.

AM – Francophiles & Skinny Ties (AM Mayhem) :: Not since the legendary Masked Marauders waxed “I Can’t Get No Nookie” has there been such a fun-filled send-up of the early Rolling Stones.

Amy Correia – Lakeville (Nettwerk) & Tom McRae – Just Like Blood (Nettwerk) :: These two stunning new albums of thoughtfully intelligent pop music will renew your flagging faith in the lost art of emotive singing and insightful songwriting.

Anavana – Anavana (Zip) :: Part sassy Debby Harry and part sultry Sade, funky is the word for this debut disc by chameleonic pop singer Annastasia Victory Kuporosova and her reggae-tinged band.

Stars – Set Yourself On Fire (Arts & Crafts) :: Ignore the inane title because you won’t find a more delightfully ethereal pop album to play this winter while you’re dashing through the snow.

Feverdream – Freeze (Coalition) :: “Shake hands with my johnson,” sings René van Lien of the Netherlands. “Do you know what it feels like to be that hung?” No, but if you wait here a moment, I’ll go get a rope so you can tell me.

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE MONTH: The Gun Club – The Las Vegas Story (Sympathy For The Record Industry) :: Remastered and reissued. Discordant and disconcerting. Off-key and off-kilter. Haunting and harrowing. Sardonic and psychotronic. A grievous mistake and a genuine masterpiece.

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #688.408.9!

The Beatles – Turn Me On Dead Man (Vigotone) :: Before he died of cancer, not only did Abbey Road engineer John Barrett secretly make hours of pristine cassette dubs of unreleased Beatles songs direct from the original multitrack masters, he also actually remixed many familiar classics. So take this bootleg, brother, may it serve you well.

Tamara Bedricky – Through These Eyes (self-released) :: Poignant easy-listening pop ballads aren’t usually my cup of tea, but I know a good voice when I hear one, and this Detroit songwriter has the pristine pipes to go the distance.

Project Oragnge – Megaphobe (BMG Canada) :: These mothercanuckers keep Canada united by recording their vapid songs in both official languages so the French can be just as bored as the English.

Yowie – Cryptooology (Skin Graft) :: Finally, a garage band that plays nothing but mental instrumentals that sound like the schizoid diagrams on the back of an Anthony Braxton album.

Paul Reddick – Villanelle (Northern Blues) :: Producer Colin Linden gives Reddick’s exceptional new album the rough echoing distorto sound of a vintage field recording. Very uncanny and very good.

The Dollyrots – Eat My Heart Out (Panic Button) :: Sky-high production values, a streetwise attitude, the chirpiest female vocalist this side of Stiff Records and album art to die for. Literally.

Mike Kenally Band – Dog (Exowax) :: Imagine if Freddie Mercury had played killer guitar and formed both the Mothers Of Invention and the Mahavishnu Orchestra. Now go listen and treat yourself.

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: The John Butler Trio – What You Want (Lava) :: By mixing spiritually sublime orchestrations with heavy lowdown hoedowns, this sampler serves notice that guitarist Butler is a future force to be reckoned with.

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #687.407.8!

Ciara – Goodies (La Face) :: Lady sings the cooze.

Bury Your Head – Cover Your Tracks (Victory) :: This bruising metal may not be what Mickey Spillane had in mind when he wrote about the white noise that roars in Mike Hammer’s brain every time he empties his nickel-plated .45 into a commie’s guts, but it’s a good start.

Avril Lavigne – Under My Skin (RCA) :: Gosh, I miss Grace Slick.

Grace Slick – Manhole (RCA) :: Ask your mom.

Big Thicket – Sexual Breakfast (SAF) :: I admire Afandi A. Menduno for playing all the instruments on this album, but I’d admire him even more if he knew how to write a good song.

Aqui – Aqui (Ace Fu) :: Tiny Tim joins Devo for the last enjoyable word in cosmic space rock.

Dead To Fall – Villainy & Virtue (Victory) :: I know the genre demands such Exorcist silliness, but I really hate to hear an otherwise excellent metal band being ruined by the laughable guttural raspings of a Drano-drinking “vocalist” who doesn’t know that satan sounds like Lionel “22” Twain.

Groove Armada – The Best Of (Jive) :: Gayer than satan.

Silvertide – Show And Tell (J) :: Attention groupies! Thirsty for the kind of classic cock rock that used to make tinsel tarts like Sable Starr fall gaping to their knees? Well, crawl this way!

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: Roxy Saint – The Underground Personality Tapes (Star Blue TV) :: This DVD proves that ribald rocker Roxy is the sleaziest skank walkin’ the plank today. So roll down your window and give this nasty girl a backseat whirl. Once around the block, Jeeves...slowly.

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S ROCK ’N’ ROLL PHOTOGRAPHS

While you’re visiting, don’t forget to view the dozens of essential selections from my vast archive of hundreds of extremely rare and previously unseen rock ’n’ roll photographs from the 1970s and 1980s—all of which were taken by myself from my front row center seat at various venerable venues; vintage historical portraits which include the following rock stars caught in their youthful prime:

David Bowie (1976 Station To Station tour) :: Lou Reed (1974 Sally Can’t Dance tour) :: Iggy Pop (1977 The Idiot tour) :: Bob Dylan (1978 Street Legal tour) :: George Harrison (1974 Dark Horse tour) :: Paul McCartney (1976 Wings Over America tour) :: Pete Townshend (1976 The Who By Numbers tour) :: Johnny Winter (1976 Captured Live! tour) :: Jeff Beck (1975 Blow By Blow tour) :: KISS (1977 Love Gun tour) :: Alice Cooper (1975 Welcome To My Nightmare tour) :: Freddie Mercury (1977 News Of The World tour) :: Amanda Lear (1975 Sweet Revenge tour) :: Rod Stewart (1977 Foot Loose & Fancy Free tour) :: Mick Jagger (1975 It’s Only Rock ’n Roll tour) :: New York Dolls (1975 Tokyo Dolls Live tour) :: Keith Richards (1975 It’s Only Rock ’n Roll tour) :: Ian Hunter (1989 YUI Orta tour) :: Elton John (1974 Caribou tour) :: Mick Ronson (1989 YUI Orta tour) :: Steven Tyler (1977 Draw The Line tour) :: Sparks (1975 Indiscreet tour) :: James Brown (1986 Gravity tour) :: Miles Davis (1985 You’re Under Arrest tour) :: Roger Daltrey (1976 The Who By Numbers tour) :: Bruce Springsteen & Clarence Clemons (1975 Born To Run tour) :: John Entwistle (1976 The Who By Numbers tour) :: Keith Moon (1976 The Who By Numbers tour) :: The Who (1976 The Who By Numbers tour) :: and more!

Ask any dealer and he’ll tell you that the best way to get someone hooked on your product is to give them a free sample, so here’s just a small taste of what’s coming your way when you click on the eleven gallery links to your left:

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #686.404.6!

Brian Wilson – Smile (Live In Concert) :: Yeah, I love paying big bucks to watch a medicated wax dummy spend the entire evening reading from two teleprompters that are force-feeding him his own lyrics.

John Frusciante – Inside Of Emptiness (Record Collection) :: If you thought his last extended player reeked, then you won’t want to smell this plugged john’s fresh runny sonic stool of amateur aural excrement.

Gov’t Mule – Déjà Voodoo (ATO) :: Formulaic but enjoyable Southern rock that’ll go down smooth with a full 60-ouncer, a loaded 12-gauge and an exposed set of 36DDs.

Katrina Carlson – Untucked (Kataphonic) :: Honey-voiced blonde swan dives into the deep end of the Pop Life pool and surfaces for an enjoyable hour-long float.

Keren Ann – Not Going Anywhere (Blue Note) :: But if you prefer your chanteuses soporifically wandering barefoot in the moonlight, then say hello to the new Nico.

Shoplifting – Shoplifting (Kill Rock Stars) :: By melding the herky sound of Pere Ubu with the jerky vocal phrasings of Patti Smith, this four-track EP shows more than enough primo potential to justify a full-length album.

3 Inches Of Blood – Advance And Vanquish (Roadrunner) :: Some critics have accused these guys of musically retreating. They didn’t retreat. They just advanced in the opposite direction.

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: Low Millions – Ex-Girlfriends (Manhattan) :: Because I’m a soft touch for old-fashioned pop music with killer riffs and witty lyrics, I got instantly hooked when I heard “Eleanor,” the first song on this debut disc. Not since a spurned Bryan Ferry penned Roxy Music’s Siren has there been such a long-playing ode to the angst of urban abandonment.

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #685.401.1!

Ray Charles – Genius Loves Company (Concord) :: And modesty hates egomaniacs.

Last Of The Famous – The Music Or The Misery (FourFiveSix) :: Make mine misery because these Clash City Poppers don’t rock my casaba.

Norman Brown – I Might (Warner Bros.) :: Sexy, soulful old-school make-out music for tough guys who’d rather be inside bangin’ than outside gangin’.

The Hentchmen – Form Follows Function (Times Beach) :: Funky reverb garage surf music with a Leigh Stephens fuzz-tone pedigree and cool black turtleneck lyrics like: “I was only five when I saw the scene of that Charger versus Steve McQueen.”

Junior Boys – Last Exit (KIN/Domino) :: Hall & Oates join Kraftwerk. File under: Outenzi Touchenzi.

Wyclef Jean – Welcome To Haiti: Creole 101 (Sak Pasé) :: Those of you who don’t speak Spanish, Creole or French can look forward to Jean’s next album: Welcome To America: English 101.

Minnie Driver – Everything I’ve Got In My Pocket (ZOE/Rounder) :: Hide the straight razor because this set of sad songs is the best melancholy music since Sinatra’s Only The Lonely.

Janiva Magness – Bury Him At The Crossroads (Northern Blues) :: On the prowl with a sexy growl, this blues-beltin’ babe provides the perfect yoni yang to Minnie’s yearning ying.

Elvis Costello – The Delivery Man (Lost Highway) :: And you thought marriage would mellow him.

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: The Briggs – Leaving The Ways (Side One Dummy) :: Absolutely the best high-energy hybrid of the Clash and Metallica you’re likely to hear in many a moon so go out and get it, got it?

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #684.396!

Jimmy Lynch – Nigger Please! (MVD Audio) :: Colorful!

Dweller – Good Morning Harakiri (Small Stone) :: Dawning!

Little Suns – Normal Human Feelings (High Romance) :: Illuminormal!

Deville – Hydra (Small Stone) :: Minky!

Redd Foxx – I Ain’t Lied Yet! (MVD Audio) :: Truthful!

Larman Clamor – Frogs (Small Stone) ::  Leaping!

Destroy This Place – Destroy The Place (Bellyache) :: Razing!

Dixie Witch – Let It Roll (Small Stone ) :: Spellbinding!

These Hearts – Yours To Take (Victory) :: Rending!

Five Horse Johnson – The Taking Of Black Heart (Small Stone) :: Captivating!

Sister Sin – Now And Forever (Victory) :: Eternal!

Sun Gods In Exile – Thanks For The Silver (Small Stone) :: Ramrodding!

The Virgin Marys – King Of Conflict (Wind-Up) :: Clashing!

Gozu – The Fury Of A Patient Man! (Small Stone) :: Raging!

Canned Heat – Live At Montreux 1973 (Eagle) :: Sterno!

Mother Of God – Anthropos (Small Stone) :: Ricoized!

Penguin Prison – Penguin Prison (Downtown) :: Elegant!

Momantha – Backwoods Payback (Small Stone) :: Squealing!

Don Nix – Living By The Days (Real Gone Elektra) :: Hawtlix!

Lord Fowl – Moon Queen (Small Stone) :: Lunachix!

Counterparts – The Difference Between Hell And Home (Victory) :: Parsing!

Lo-Pan – Salvador (Small Stone) :: Hi-Praise!

Sister Sin – Dance Of The Wicked (Victory) :: Gavotting!

Skanska Mord – Paths To Charon (Small Stone) :: Styxxy!

The Duke Spirit – Bruiser (Fiction) :: Two-Fisted!

Freedom Hawk – Holding On (Small Stone) :: Soaring!

Tear Out The Heart – Violence (Victory) :: Rending!

Nightstalker – Dead Rock Commandos (Small Stone) :: Kolchakking!

Bushmaster – Revolution Rhapsody (self released) :: Raptivating!

Abrahma – Through The Dusty Paths Of Our Lives (Small Stone) :: Chartopping!

Skillet & Leroy & Lawanda Page – 2 Or 3 Times A Day (MVD Audio) :: Insatiable!

Green Leaf – Nest Of Vipers (Small Stone) :: Biting!

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: Thomas Alexander – Piano Madness (self released) :: Gershwinnner!

Be Seeing You!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #683.395!

Bob Dylan – Selfie (Columbia) :: As if remixing old albums wasn’t bad enough, now they’re retitling them.

John Foxx – Metamatic (Metal Beat) :: This decades ahead of its time concept album about the Kennedy assassination contains automated metal machine music that’s so charmingly cold and coolly calculating it makes Gary Numan sound positively human by comparison. It’s the perfect gift for the conspiracy theorist on your holiday shopping list who has everything—and so is this:

Vincent Bugliosi – Reclaiming History: The Assassination Of President John F. Kennedy (Norton) :: One volume. Five pounds. 1,600 pages. 1,000 additional pages of supplementary notes and sources on two portable document files on one compact disc. All this plus the greatest conspiracy joke on page 1,489? Case closed!

Andrew Lloyd Webber & Mick Jagger – Tumbling Dice, Superstar (Bialistock & Bloom) :: Which twin wins the Tony? Neither one since “Tumbling Dice! Tumbling Dice! Who are you? What have you sacrificed?” is the world’s worst ill-advised Broadway lyric ever.

Various Artists – Annie: The Musical: The New 2012 Broadway Cast Recording (Shout! Factory) :: Because as every rock critic knows, you’re never fully dressed without a simile.

SAINTLY PLATTER OF THE WEEK: The Sojourners – Sing And Never Get Tired (Little Pig) :: I saw these three cool cats strutting their barn burning stuff at Folk Alliance earlier this year so I’m more than pleased to testify that they’ve got a brand new long player out that continues to showcase their unique style of gospelized funk-fuelled spiritual three part harmonies. So do yourself a very big favor and pick up on what these number one soulful brothers are putting down because you could do a lot worse than spend some of your finite heartbeats listening to The Sojourners. Indeed, you probably already have so spin this platter pronto and set yourself on the road to redemption before it’s too late!

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: The Flowers Of Hell – Odes (Optical Sounds) :: Word has it that Unca Lou loved this thematic tribute album to himself that came out in 2012—and rightly so, given that it cannily coalesces the best of his Velvet Underground excursions with some rare solo transmogrifications such as a rare first draft early lyric interpretation of “Walk On The Wild Side” that’s well worth the price of admission alone. But Lou’s dead so you’ll have to take my word for it in 2013 that this is now the most poignant Lou Reed tribute album you’ll hear this year. Bonus points for including a Nicoized version of “Mr. Tambourine Man” that would’ve sounded right at home on Chelsea Girl.

Be seeing you!

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #682.392!

Chilliwack – Lights From The Valley (Mushroom) :: The liner notes say that Chilliwack means “Valley Of Many Streams” in Halq’eméylem.

Doucette – Mama Let Him Play (Mushroom) :: Papa make him stop!

Chilliwack –Dreams, Dreams, Dreams (Mushroom) :: And Wikipedia says that Chilliwack means “Going Back Up” in Salish.

Doucette – The Douce Is Loose (Mushroom) :: And if his name was Douchette this album woulda been called...

Chilliwack – Breakdown In Paradise (Mushroom) :: But judging from the small print that says: “We acknowledge the financial support of the Government of Canada through the Department of Canadian Heritage (Canada Music Fund) for this project,” I think Chilliwack means “Taxpayerola” in Freedian.

The Sattalites – The Best Of Canadian Reggae (Solid Gold) :: Not to be confused with the Sunnalights; Monnalights; Tuessalights; Weddalights; Thurssalights; or Friialiites, these here Sattalights have been rolling their own funky brand of reggae longer than the Department of Canadian Heritage and Canada Music Fund has been providing financial support for decades-old deleted discs like this. So, before it gets drilled anew, you would do well to give it a spin and hear for yourself what the Canuckistan taxpayer is being forced to shell out and support these days against their collective will under the dubious guise of historical value.

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: Art Decade – Art Decade (self released) :: If you screw on your thinking cap, you just might remember what I said about these cat’s début long player back in MB353 but, if not, I’ll reiterate for ya:

“Art Decade – Western Sunrise (Eldest Only) :: A lesser league of leeches woulda called themselves “Chant Of The Ever Circling Skeletal Family” or “Homo From Aldebaran” but, the way I see it, if you’re gonna name your band after an obscure ’70s David Bowie instrumental, then choosing the atmospherically arch decadent “Art Decade” is definitely the way to go—and, boy howdy, does this excellent album ever live up to that makeshift moniker and go go go!

“The first two seconds sound like a James Brown intro before everything suddenly switches into a string-soaked Beatlesque art rock escapade which owes more than a lush nod to Queen Mercury in the vocal arrangement and songwriting department. There’s also an admirable element of ’80s symphonic synthesizer pop in place to spice up the proceedings—but don’t think they’re not capable of breaking out the big audio dynamite because the longer you listen, the louder things get.

“Bonus points for including a glossy full color twelve page booklet that contains nothing but twelve full bleed paintings which are completely devoid of text—and that’s an extreme visual treat that even Eno and Peter Schmidt never attempted to do at their Taking Tiger Mountain (By Strategy) and Before And After Science art rock peak of perfection.”

That’s how they began the year last February and, wouldn’t you know it, here they are again with a year-ending roundhouse to polish things off and lemme tell ya that it’s a good ’un. If anything, it’s even more of a string-soaked Beatlesque art rock escapade (Greylock Hill”) which owes more than a lush nod to Queen Mercury (“Boredom”) in the vocal arrangement and songwriting department. And while many a band from Badfinger and ELO to Cheap Trick and the Knack have successfully mined that particular pop vein at various points during their careers, keep in mind that it’s by no means as easy to do as it sounds—just ask Brian Wilson.

So if you didn’t take my advice at the beginning of the year, now’s your chance to make amends unless, of course, you’re waiting for the band to gnaw some blotter acid and “head” into their psychedelic period—which might not be such a bad idea. I mean, think about it, man. Aren’t you curious about what a lysergically-soaked Freddie Mercury would sound like? I’m curious. I’m very curious. Are you curious?

Be seeing you!