WEE WEE WEE ALL THE WAY JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #340!

Rwake – “It Was Beautiful, But Now It’s Sour” (Relapse) :: What can you say about a 12 minute music video whose press release brags that it: “...features devastating slow motion close-ups of actual pig fetuses being absolutely annihilated by a variety of implements”? You said it.

Nine Inch Nails – “March Of The Pigs” (Nothing) :: Is this the price we have to pay for George Harrison?

George Harrison – “Piggies” (Apple) :: Yes, in spades.

Rwake – “It Was Beautiful, But Now It’s Sour” (Relapse) :: Oh, and for those of you who were wondering: No, I am not their drummer; I couldn’t afford the cut in pay.

SIZZLING PLATTER OF THE WEEK: The Scenics – Dead Man Walks Down Bayview (Dream Tower) :: Y’know, I really do gotta lay off the sauce ’cause my double vision is playing hob with even these plain old Anglo album titles. Why, I thought this was some kinda rummy Dean Martin tribute album until mine eyes unplastered themselves long enough to read the words properly—and even then I thought it was some kinda soused-up zombified Walking Dean soundtrack on the D.T. label. So, just like Scorpio did in Dirty Harry, I paid this big beefcake of a bruiser some serious simoleons to smack me silly until I was sufficiently sobered up to pick up on what this trio plus one were putting down.

And speaking of smack, these here supersonic Scenics remain the hallowed inheritors of the twangy jing-jangly Velvet Underground sound heard on Unca Lou’s laconic Loaded album. Now I don’t expect y’all to recall that I’ve said similar things about this quintet minus one before, so I’ll reiterate for ya:

“If the proceedings sound even more demented than you might expect, that's because the Scenics don't ape the Velvets, they enhance them—which only goes to show that sometimes between rot and depression there lies a lifeline.”

Impressive, I know. Which is why I’d like nothing better than to dump on this new distorto-drenched disc of theirs, if only to prove once and for all that I’m not some kinda sell-out shill who’s parked on their payola payroll. But just like that crazy mirror in the bathroom, I just can’t stop it since this duo plus two ain’t dropped a stitch yet in that their steely eyes still span the stylistic gamut whether they’re flashing their punk roots on “No Sleep” or shotgunning “Sister Ray” with “Gone Dead Train” on “O Boy” or hitting you where you live with a blunt ballad like “A Fox, Her Fur, And Where She Parks It.” Bonus points for including a bonus track.

Groucho Marx – Horse Feathers (Paramount) :: Bring your dog around and I’ll give him a bonus, too.

Jimi Hendrix – “Fire” (Reprise) :: Move over, Rover.

Led Zeppelin – “The Rover” (Swan Song) :: Exactly!

Be seeing you!