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Saturday, January 27, 2018

JEFFREY MORGANíS MEDIA BLACKOUT #611

 

JEFFREY MORGAN’S MEDIA BLACKOUT #611.252!

 

Alice CooperLay Down And Die, Goodbye (Straight) :: If lacquering his liver for years with Budweiser and Canadian Club didn’t kill him, then nothing will. File under: Too Tough To Die.

 

Elton JohnSomeone Saved My Life Tonight (MCA) :: If Bernie hadn’t pulled Reg’s head out of that gas oven, we never would’ve have had the pleasure of hearing him subsequently shill: “Sassoon says so much”! Anyone got a match?

 

Frank GallupGot A Match? (Paramount) :: I beg your pardon!

 

Ozzy OsbourneSuicide Solution (Epic) :: If the bat-bite rabies didn’t kill him, then nothing will. File under: Too Tough To Die.

 

MetallicaFade To Black (Elektra) :: What, they’re still alive? Amateurs!

 

PrinceSexual Suicide (NPG) :: File under: Freddie Mercury.

 

Freddie MercuryDon’t Try Suicide (Elektra) :: Ironic, innit?

 

Paul McCartneySuicide (Capitol) :: You’d think that writing a song called “Suicide” at age fourteen would portend something dire, but daddy says nothing doing. File under: Too Tough To Die.

 

David Lee RothJump (Warner Bros.) :: When he sings “Go ahead and jump!” what did you think he was talking about? Hopscotch?

 

Cheap TrickAuf Wiedersehen (Epic) :: Need a push?

 

SparksHere In Heaven (Island) :: Only Ron Mael could write a song about a suicide pact in which the woman reneges—as sung from the point of view of the man who, having gone first, said goodbye cruel world: “Now I know why you let me take the lead.”

 

The MashSuicide Is Painless (Columbia) :: Number one with a bullet!

 

Grand Funk RailroadBorn To Die (Capitol) :: What, they’re still alive? Amateurs!

 

Woody GuthrieSo Long, It’s been Good To Know Yuh (Elektra) :: Even Okies get the dust bowl blues.

 

Phil OchsRehearsals For Retirement (A&M) :: Merely the greatest—and, regrettably, most prophetic—album cover ever.

 

Trent ReznorGave Up (Nothing) :: When the singer describes his music as being “an ultra fast chunk of death” and then repeatedly wails “I tried, I gave up” you’d think that he would’ve backed up his brag by now, but no. File under: Too Tough To Die.

 

RamonesToo Tough To Die (Sire) :: Really?

 

Iggy & The StoogesDeath Trip (Columbia) :: What, they’re still alive? Amateurs!

 

PRESCIENT PLATTER OF THE WEEK – SAD ONE: Michael HutchenceSuicide Blonde (Mercury) :: Professional.

 

PRESCIENT PLATTER OF THE WEEK – SAD TWO: Kurt CobainI Hate Myself And I Want To Die (Geffen) :: To a fault.

 

Dorothy ParkerRésumé (Enough Rope) :: “Razors pain you; rivers are damp. Acids stain you; and drugs cause cramp. Guns aren’t
                  lawful; nooses give. Gas smells awful; you might as well live.”
 

Be seeing you!

Sat, January 27, 2018 | link 


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